Been Stuck, & About Those Library Books I Need to Return Pronto

The words haven’t been stuck but I’ve been reluctant to share what’s on my mind as it all seems just too self-indulgent or worried my private thoughts may be misconstrued.

Now and then I do get depressed and anxious over life and the path I’ve got stuck on. Often I feel tremendously useless. Often I just wish I could fly away to another country and start over. Wish I had a time machine too because some dreams I am sadly way too old to fulfil now. I just don’t want to have feelings of regret anymore as time is so fleeting. I don’t want to feel trapped anymore.

Been yearning to write but haven’t logged on to this account in a while. I need to write only the truth. Also missed all the blogs I used to read.

24 hours in a day never seems enough in this highly connected new world. I suffer from major information overload and needing to check the internet all the time. When I am away from a wifi connection I sure do feel quite lost and anxious. A feeling that I am missing out on a lot. But at the same time it’s rather freeing.

Borrowed books from the library and hardly read them. Need to return them soon, as I have no idea how to pay for a fine. And the hassle of it all. The thing about borrowing books is that at the back of my mind there’s always this feeling of urgency about having to return them and not wanting to be caught up with a huge fine. I’m always on time, but I’m paranoid that way. I have this irritatingly worrisome nature and long to be carefree. This is why I prefer to buy books that I can own indefinitely and read over and over at my leisure. But with library books I tend to read more. I guess I just overdid it this time. I should just borrow one or two at a time.

I tend to overdo things all the time, or get overwhelmed. I always want to do a number of things and get anxious over the urgency of it all. I also want to do things well and not in a slip shot manner. I guess we all have these urges?

Yes just rambling again and thanks for indulging me as writing for people out there, rather than in my dairy, feels more reassuring.

I have an idea to research travel in countries I have never been to, or might never get to, and blog about it. I like the idea that the information might come in handy to someone. I just love doing research, but was never quite able to get into it as a profession.

I’ll start with New Orleans perhaps, as I know someone who will be venturing there. Maybe I’ll get tips from readers who live there and that would be pretty amazing.

About bookjunkie

Blogging about life in Singapore & recently cancer too.
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4 Responses to Been Stuck, & About Those Library Books I Need to Return Pronto

  1. katrijn says:

    I’m just happy that you’re back!

  2. Sorry it’s been such a rough time. hugs

    • bookjunkie says:

      thanks dear…some up days and some down days but right now it’s up. And even though I’ve been away I still like checking out your blog and especially photos of your sweet girls put a smile on my face.

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