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Tag Archives: personal
What are the three best decisions you’ve ever made?
I keep dwelling on decisions I regret so I am keen to do this more positive exercise instead. In real time. That is, whatever I type right now will be published unedited. 1. Immediately I think of travel. There is … Continue reading
Posted in Midlife Musings
Tagged childhood, family, Life, mother, personal, thoughts
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For Those Who Grieve? The Unbearable Pain Does Diminish
1. Don’t suppress your emotions. Being “strong” will damage you mentally. Get professional help like counselling early. Do everything in your own time and don’t be rushed or pressured. This is not the best time to make decisions. (I regret … Continue reading
Being Human
The inadequacy I feel is crushing. I can’t believe I am here. How did I even get here? I know the various traumas. I feel like a broken recorder. No one likes to hear complaints. Well perhaps you won’t mind … Continue reading
Posted in Cancer, Midlife Musings, Singapore Living, When Work Sucks
Tagged feelings, Life, Low confidence, personal, self esteem, shame
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#5. Letter to my Papa
Papa, so often in the past 19 years, there have been world events and even just local events that I want to talk to you about. Just so much of life is happening and it’s not fair that you’re missing … Continue reading
Posted in Grief, Midlife Musings
Tagged dad, father, grief, loss, love, papa, personal
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#3. Letter to my Papa
I feel lonely without you. I thought the vacuum wouldn’t remain for this long, but it has for almost 19 years now. Me missing you is a testament to what a good father you were. I didn’t realise it then, … Continue reading
#1. Letter to my Papa
Papa, the last time I communicated with you was through text. And back then texting was very expensive and I found out you spent S$92 on texts from overseas. Don’t know if it’s accurate, but somehow that number is stuck … Continue reading
Posted in Grief
Tagged coping, grief, letters to my father, loss, love, papa, personal, thoughts
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Perth Day 1: Rest Stop at Miami Bakehouse
I didn’t start blogging about my trip to Western Australia chronologically. I started with Joondalup which was actually the 7th day of the trip as I was so overjoyed to see my sweet cousin there. Now I’ll start from the … Continue reading
Posted in Travel
Tagged Miami Bakehouse, personal, Perth, perth trip, travel, WA, Western Australia
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Perth Trip Day 7: Joondalup Lake is a Cherished Place in My Heart (Neil Hawkins Park)
My uncle always tells me about how he loves to take a walk by the Joondalup Lake, so I have been yearning to see the place in person. My sweet cousin drove us there and it was even more lovely … Continue reading
Posted in Travel
Tagged favourite, joondalup lake, lake, nature, personal, Perth, travel, Western Australia
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Manifesting Works: First Trip in 3 Years
Been meaning to blog about my first trip out of Singapore in 3 years and 3 months, but have felt too overwhelmed by the weather differences to commence writing. The average temperature in Perth and Western Australia was around 11 … Continue reading
Posted in Singapore Living, Travel
Tagged covid, personal, Perth, post covid travel, travel, Western Australia
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Feel So Happy Meeting with Two of My Cousins After Almost 4 Years
I have social anxiety, but I don’t feel it with people I’m comfortable with like my cousins. I practically saw them grow up, being the much older cousin. They were the cutest toddlers. It’s true what they say about cousins … Continue reading
Lovely to See My Cousin After More than 2 Years
We met for a buffet at The Straits Kitchen Hyatt. The quality of food is good and the service very polite and attentive. One of the staff, Huri, took the effort to redo the teh halia (ginger tea) for my … Continue reading
Posted in Singapore Living
Tagged Food, Hotel buffet, Life, Living, personal, photography, photos, Singapore
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Playing the Piano Again
I’m feeling so happy today. I bought a new piano book at Yamaha (the old time piano studio that still exists in Singapore after all these years). Playing something new helps me assess a different party of my brain, the … Continue reading
Posted in Midlife Musings, Singapore Living
Tagged brain, chemo, habits, happiness, Life, Living, personal, piano, practise, thoughts, writing
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My Sinnamma
My mum’s younger sister is, in one significant way, like me. We are both childless by circumstance. I know for sure that my aunt always wanted kids, but in a selfish way I’m glad she didn’t or I wouldn’t have … Continue reading
Posted in Midlife Musings
Tagged Aunt, aunt with no kids, Life, Living, personal, thoughts
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Why it’s Better to Grow Up in Singapore Today Compared to the 70’s and 80’s
These are just my personal feelings (I’m a diary blogger & not a journalist by any means) based on my particular childhood experiences some of which I don’t wish to relive. Nothing set in concrete. I used to always think … Continue reading
Posted in Midlife Musings, Singapore Living, When Work Sucks
Tagged culture, Life, Living, personal, Singapore, thoughts, values, women
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This Crazy Need to be Constantly Productive
I look at characters in movies and they get so much done within a day. It makes me feel like a sloth, as on some days, even waking up is a chore. There’s this constant need to be ticking off … Continue reading
Posted in Midlife Musings, Singapore Living, When Work Sucks
Tagged culture, empathy, ethics, kindness, Life, Living, personal, Singapore, thoughts, values
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Conversations About The Second World War
We mentioned to my almost 86 year old uncle that we recently visited the National Museum. There was an exhibit about the Second World War and Japanese Occupation of Singapore. It made him recollect: “When we heard the sirens we … Continue reading
Posted in Midlife Musings, Singapore Living
Tagged education, family, grief, history, Japanese occupation, memories, old Singapore, personal, thoughts, War
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My History
Some blogs are truly engaging. Often I am so drawn in that I feel compelled to leave a comment. Usually the writer has been incredibly generous and brave with their life story. I can’t help but wonder, am I wasting … Continue reading
Posted in Anxiety, Blogging & Writing, Culture & Society, Midlife Musings, Singapore Living
Tagged Ceylon, ceylonese, childless, childless by circumstance, culture, Life, Living, midlife, no children, personal, Singapore, society
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Does Midlife Begin When You Hit Menopause?
My sister is 50 but hasn’t hit menopause yet and has a remarkable amount of energy. The energy she has is comparable to what I had in my twenties which makes me wonder why I’m so defective. We share 50% … Continue reading
Posted in Cancer, Midlife Musings
Tagged age 50, age 51, aging, cancer, hot flush, menopause, personal, surgical menopause, thoughts, tips
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Anxiety: Why Am I Wired This Way?
My brain has been wired by trauma to always think of the worse possible outcome, so that I can be prepared. I’m constantly in fight or flight mode. It’s a terrible state to be in and I wish I wasn’t … Continue reading
The 21st Anniversary of My Very First Major Operation
It’s crazy to think that around this time 21 years ago I was rushed to hospital and they had to perform an emergency appendectomy. It was my very first time under the knife and pretty much a traumatic nightmare. A … Continue reading
Posted in Cancer, Midlife Musings
Tagged appendectomy, cancer, cancer surgery, Life, Living, operations, personal, tumours
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Netflix: The Lost Daughter
This is probably an unpopular opinion, but I really loathed and was actually repulsed by the main character Leda in ‘The Lost Daughter’, played by Olivia Coleman. She has an affair and leaves her two very young daughters for three … Continue reading
Posted in Midlife Musings
Tagged children, culture, Life, motherhood, movie review, personal, The Lost Daughter
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Is This Old Age?
I refuse to accept that I’m old at just 51. But these days, whenever I struggle to wake up, with all the muscles and joints in my upper body aching, I feel old. When my mum was 51 she looked … Continue reading
Posted in Cancer, Midlife Musings
Tagged aging, getting old, Life, Living, midlife, old age, personal, thoughts
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