Please don’t hate me for this post, but I felt compelled to be brutally honest about this.
Have you ever had people in your life that always remain acquaintances and never cross over to being real friends? When you get older, especially in mid-life, you’ll feel like you’re wasting your time keeping these up. Every encounter with them is like small talk all over again and I really do hate small talk. I have also become ruthless in not wanting to meet people (anymore) who are overly ostentatious and superficial. People with a superiority complex. It’s just very draining when all they want to do is blatantly flaunt their wealth or how much they know. It’s ok if they are sharing experiences, but it becomes unbearable with it’s accompanied all the time by this element of boasting and showboating. And even though you’ve known them for years, you never really know them because you realize they never share anything real. They seem to always want to project a perfect image and are afraid of tarnishing this facade. You never really know who they are deep down inside. There is zero emotional connection. I already feel terrible writing this, but it’s the truth and I just had to get it off my chest.
I feel very guilty about this as well, but as I get older I also find that I have less and less in common with people I once thought I was close to. It’s even worse when you realize they judge you based on superficial things and are not there for you when you’re really down and out. I don’t want to spend time with people who are overly concerned about status or people who are obsessed with money. It’s just too draining.
I never ever would have thought I would reach this state when I was younger, but losing those dearest to you makes you realize time is really important and I don’t want to waste it on superficial or negative relationships. If meeting a certain person makes you feel bad, without fail, each and every time, then I would suggest you don’t meet them anymore. It’s not worth it. Try not to feel guilty or sentimental about it. Sometimes you need to think about your own mental health and well being. When I say this I am actually talking out loud to myself as well.
I also see people in relationships where all they do is give, give, give and the other parties take, take, take. It drives me nuts. That kind of thing I was oblivious to in my twenties but I’m glad I wasn’t a sucker for long.
I feel like people in the blog world are more real and less superficial then some people I know, as they are willing to put themselves out there. Willing to share that emotional and vulnerable side of them. To show that they are not perfect, and I really do appreciate that. Even though I don’t want to reveal who I am (due to millions of reasons), I feel like I can be my real self here and it’s extremely liberating. I do have my own insecurities and I’m far from perfect, but as I get older I am starting to listen more and more to my instincts. Yeah, if I had to give anyone advice, I would say trust your instincts. Thanks for that reminder cousin D.