Tag Archives: thoughts

Confused & Conflicted (Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder)

I don’t feel old, but I feel old in comparison to those under 30 especially. Grateful to learn from them as they introduce me to a new world. New terms and new ways of looking at the world. A kind … Continue reading

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Revolted by the Article in Our Newspapers about Hitting Children

This article truly triggered me. It presents the findings of a survey that shows 40% of parents use corporal punishment. It doesn’t take any stand against it. It even seems to be excusing it. The study found that younger children … Continue reading

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When My Faith is Shaken

When someone I think is highly intelligent, like Ricky Gervais, talks about evidence and no proof there is a God I feel horrified as I listen, because I don’t want to agree. I don’t want my skeptical brain to concur. … Continue reading

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Ceylonese Singaporean

I am so excited that a novel set in Sri Lanka has been shortlisted for the 2022 Booker prize and I’m hungry to read it. My partner was the one who alerted me to it. He knows me so well. … Continue reading

Posted in Culture & Society, family, Midlife Musings, My Childhood, my teenhood, Singapore Living | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Evolution of my Blog

When I first started out blogging actively and regularly in 2010, it was mostly superficial posts on celebs, food and touristy things. It made life exciting. Being a tourist in your own country. These are often my more cheerful posts. … Continue reading

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Bus Ride: Living Deliberately

Raindrops on the big glass panel. The coolness of a drizzly morning. Looking out I see teenaged joy. Two on a bike. An old lady with a blue umbrella dragging her trolley on the way to get her groceries. Bell … Continue reading

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Truly Frustrated By Sudden Onset And Worsening of Psoriosis

I’ll begin on a positive note. I have found that the moisturiser by Cerave helps me quite a bit. At least it makes the situation less aggravated and calms my skin a little bit. I need to buy more as … Continue reading

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Taxi Drivers Educate Me About Why I Can’t Get A Taxi Post Covid & Interesting Daily Routine Stories

I love listening to a new story each time I get into a taxi. Recently the taxi driver who picked me up shared with me that he’s 63 years old, but to me he didn’t look anything past 50 something. … Continue reading

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Feeling Lost today till a Stranger (not quite actually) & Kind Soul reached out

19 years ago I lost my beloved Papa and this whole week (the dates) are a reminder of my nightmares and trauma. I did things today, I would normally enjoy, but I couldn’t quite taste my food or have any … Continue reading

Posted in aging, Anxiety, Blogging & Writing, Grief, Midlife Musings, psoriasis, Trauma | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Hesitating to Write about My Psoriasis

I’ve been stopping myself from sharing on this blog, because I’m afraid of being judged. That’s the danger of being honest and putting yourself out there. I really shouldn’t care about the negativity, because that hinders me from connecting with … Continue reading

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Oncology Checkup

My writing today will be as real as it can get. Just pure emotion. In real time. 9am: Can’t bring myself to wake up and face the day. There is a heaviness of dread. Can’t wait for the ordeal to … Continue reading

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My Partner’s Thoughts on Aging

Decided to ask B as well, after sharing my mum’s refreshing optimistic viewpoint in the last post. He’s usually a logical pessimist, while I’m a more emotional anxious person and we don’t always agree, so I was surprised to find … Continue reading

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What are the three best decisions you’ve ever made?

I keep dwelling on decisions I regret so I am keen to do this more positive exercise instead. In real time. That is, whatever I type right now will be published unedited. 1. Immediately I think of travel. There is … Continue reading

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Trying to Help Myself

I tend to build up negative scenarios in my head that never materialise in real life. Often they have to do with failure and rejection. Often these scenes appear in my nightmares when I try « not to think » … Continue reading

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#1. Letter to my Papa

Papa, the last time I communicated with you was through text. And back then texting was very expensive and I found out you spent S$92 on texts from overseas. Don’t know if it’s accurate, but somehow that number is stuck … Continue reading

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Thoughts about Our Existence

As I get older, reality doesn’t seem as solid anymore. Everything feels hazy. Almost dream like. I absolutely can’t process that I’m 51 already and 52 next. Past the dreaded milestone (I also have survivor’s guilt as in why did … Continue reading

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Manifesting Travel

My cousins put up their results of an online travel quiz, so I was curious enough to do it too. They are a dozen years my junior, so in comparison I really haven’t travelled that much. This survey only looks … Continue reading

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Perth Trip Day 9: Sad the Trip has Ended but always glad to be home sweet home

My mum was especially happy to be home in her comfort zone. I think I was sad to leave as I prefer the cold weather and nature in Australia. But also have been feeling like I’ve finally been let out … Continue reading

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Playing the Piano Again

I’m feeling so happy today. I bought a new piano book at Yamaha (the old time piano studio that still exists in Singapore after all these years). Playing something new helps me assess a different party of my brain, the … Continue reading

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My Sinnamma

My mum’s younger sister is, in one significant way, like me. We are both childless by circumstance. I know for sure that my aunt always wanted kids, but in a selfish way I’m glad she didn’t or I wouldn’t have … Continue reading

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Why it’s Better to Grow Up in Singapore Today Compared to the 70’s and 80’s

These are just my personal feelings (I’m a diary blogger & not a journalist by any means) based on my particular childhood experiences some of which I don’t wish to relive. Nothing set in concrete. I used to always think … Continue reading

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This Crazy Need to be Constantly Productive

I look at characters in movies and they get so much done within a day. It makes me feel like a sloth, as on some days, even waking up is a chore. There’s this constant need to be ticking off … Continue reading

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