I often wonder about this and I feel like I have multiple personalities as I blog about a spectrum of things ranging from the seemingly superficial and frivolous, to issues that truly bother me. Blogging is free therapy for me. The icing on the cake is when fellow bloggers or readers reach out and share their own anxieties. Feels like we collectively improve our mental health and draw a focus on things that should change.
I know for sure what kind of blogger I am not. I am not intelligent or brave enough to be a political blogger. But I deeply admire those who are. However, there are social issues that have affected me in life that I feel compelled to speak about, like sexual harassment, bullying and discrimination. Also unfortunately there is no true freedom of expression, although it would be a dream if one day we were evolved enough and there was. Perhaps then I wouldn’t feel so claustrophobic and it would be a healthier society for all to live in. For me it’s too late, but hopefully not for my nieces and nephews. I desire more freedom and a better life for them.
I am definitely not a parent blogger as I don’t have kids. Some choose to be child free and that is totally their prerogative as overpopulation is harming Mother Nature anyway. For me, it’s not by choice, but circumstance. I always longed for children. Perhaps in another life, another dimension. I stopped longing after the cancer diagnosis and hysterectomy. It put an abrupt end to my hopes even though it was not very likely at that point. I’ve never stopped grieving though and it’s something very few talk about as we worry that many wouldn’t empathise.
I always wanted to be a young mum like my own mum. I know for sure I’d be a great mum, because I have the best mum – an angel. And even if my children didn’t have a great mum they would benefit from an angel grandma. I do enjoy the content of parenting bloggers as I love children (practically seeing them grow up and thrive online is lovely) and their suggestions appeal to me as an auntie. A role I am utterly grateful for.
I am not a food blogger as I don’t really know how to cook and don’t really enjoy it, so am unable to truly know how to rate food professionally. What you’ll read are my subjective opinions. Food is so much part of the Singapore experience and identity that it’s impossible not to talk about it.
Some of my favourite foods tasted horrible during chemo. Everything tasted like melted down forks. Which reminded me that I was a cancer blogger for a while (2016-2018) but I since I seem to be in remission I haven’t been writing about it. I hope to though, to help fellow patients and my heart goes out to the immune compromised undergoing chemo during covid. I feel fortunate in comparison.
I’m definitely not a lifestyle, fashion or fitness blogger and I am not into fashion or shopping. I definitely don’t look as attractive as several of the personalities out there. They are all body goals and genetically blessed. I am keen on beauty products though, not so much makeup, but skin care. When you cross 50 and your face starts falling, you get desperate. I also like the feeling of moisturised skin, but the kind that smells good, gets totally absorbed and doesn’t cause breakouts. Unfortunately I still get breakouts. Isn’t it cruel that breakouts and wrinkles coexist. I thought I’d be rid of them by now.
I guess if I had to narrow it down, I am a personal blogger who enjoys recording snippets of her daily life and travels (prior to Covid ruining life as we knew it) but not truly exposing myself with selfies. I have no desire to be recognised on the street and deeply value my privacy. I don’t think very much of myself anyway so don’t think there is anything worth showing. And I am not keen on meeting anyone as I am very self conscious and am afraid of disappointing you. Yes, my confidence just keeps plummeting as I age. But I’m working on that.
They say when you blog it’s better to blog to a niche audience. I can’t quite confine myself to just daily photos of Singapore even though it’s what my blog name may suggest. As one of the rare female bloggers in their fifties without kids, I guess I write in order to connect with those like me. Those hidden in the fringes of society, probably large in numbers, just overlooked, undervalued and underestimated.
I allow myself to be vulnerable. Hiding my vulnerabilities would feel deceitful. I talk about my anxiety, claustrophobia and panic attacks. Writers should be true to themselves and I admire those who are brutally honest – so brave.
Blogs started out as online diaries anyway, but now it seems to be all about monetisation. Not that I am not interested in being financially secure, although I have been operating at a loss since 2005 as I don’t want to sell out or have my integrity compromised. I was offered 5000 dollars for the blog but it seemed too little for all the toil I put into this labour of love.
Been toying with the idea of a tip jar for years, but have no clue how to set it up. One day soon I will, as I hope not to go the way of adverts that pop up that annoy the reader. I seriously dislike ads myself and they put me off reading blogs and makes me question the objectivity. Especially if the product shilling is excessive. If they pick a few brands that they truly believe it I would be ok with that as we all have our favourites. Off the top my head one would be Moleskine for me. It’s a luxury I would find hard to live without.
I know what I stand for though. That is clear. I am against bullying – from the playground to the workplace. And often, bullying can be subtle but devastating. I believe there needs to be better protection for children, elderly and stronger laws against harassment in the workplace. Why don’t we have a sex offender registry? It enrages me so much when I read about reoffenders. Definitely more education and awareness is needed. In my time this was sorely lacking and might explain why I am where I am and I wouldn’t want anyone else’s life or career to be derailed the same way. Me too (#metoo) came too late for me.
I used to work at a big American company (loved it) and truly believe that given the right environment and tools, everyone comes to work self motivated. From experience I know that it only takes one person to ruin your career and demotivate you. Most people I know quit their jobs because one person in power, not necessarily their boss, is making their life hell.
I think I am a bit of everything. So if you’d like to hear about life in Singapore by a Singaporean in their midlife, who has lived on this tiny island her whole life, I’d love if you drop by and leave a comment and join this little space on the internet. I’m seeking my tribe too.