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Tag Archives: cancer
Some Days I Can & Other Days I Just Can’t
I can be pretty hard on myself. I think I’m too lax, but that’s what my partner and mum tell me. I am trying desperately to regain my fitness. It gets harder as you’re aging and I suppose even harder … Continue reading
I’m Concerned About Injuries
I wish I could push myself to the extreme the way I did without worry in my twenties. That’s one of the hardest parts about aging. I used to walk long distances and swim countless laps in the University pool. … Continue reading
Posted in aging, Cancer, Health & Wellness, Midlife Musings
Tagged aging, anxiety, cancer, exercise, weak knees
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I Hope I Can Keep this Up
Finally woke up early again and was able to do my morning walk. Been feeling panicky lately, as I feel that with the psoriasis, it indicates that my immune system is not doing well. The steroids are not working and … Continue reading
Posted in Anxiety, Cancer, Health & Wellness, psoriasis
Tagged cancer, exercise, health, intermittent fasting, psoriosis, walking, weight
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Feel Like I Have Nothing Significant to Share Right Now
It is why I hardly write. I only write when I feel the compulsion. It can’t really be forced especially with regards to matters of the heart. Also I am now extremely self conscious about the oversharing I did shortly … Continue reading
Posted in Anxiety, Cancer, Midlife Musings, Trauma
Tagged abuse, cancer, Life, oversharing, relationships, secrets, trauma
2 Comments
Been Almost 7 Years Since that Cancer Diagnosis in 2016
My oncologist is so pleased every time I get a good tumour marker reading. She always tells me well done, although I honestly feel like I’ve done nothing. I just lay there. Everyone else did everything. Well I did try … Continue reading
Posted in Anxiety, Cancer
Tagged anxiety, cancer, CT scan, fear, humour, personal, remission, scanxiety, statistics, tumour marker
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Curious about Natural Menopause
I wonder when I would have actually had menopause if not for the surgical one at 45. My friend at 52 hasn’t reached menopause yet. And my mum thinks she had menopause in her mid fifties. Honestly I feel robbed … Continue reading
Posted in Cancer
Tagged anxiety, cancer, endometrial cancer, remission, stress, surgical menopause
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Have Not Been Writing
I don’t feel an urge to write when I feel I can’t be completely honest. It’s like – what’s the point? In my entire life I have never lied other than doing it to spare someone’s feelings. Like an insecure … Continue reading
Posted in Anxiety, Blogging & Writing, Cancer, Midlife Musings, Singapore Living
Tagged anxiety, cancer, honesty, insecurity, Life, writing
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On this Day: 9th September 2022
Update 17th September 2022: I so agree with how Trevor Noah articulated it on The Daily Show. Each person has a different experience with the same person and you can’t force your opinion on them. If they had a bad … Continue reading
Posted in Singapore Headlines, Singapore Living
Tagged anxiety, cancer, insurance, King Charles, news, Queen Elizabeth
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Always Regret Reading the Headlines in the Straits Times
All it does is to give me intense anxiety. Why is there never any good news. It’s all gloom. It’s all about money and it feels like in this country (and perhaps many others other than the Scandinavian countries) you … Continue reading
Posted in Cancer, Singapore Living
Tagged anxiety, cancer, cost, distress, immunotherapy, worry
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Long Term Effects of Radiotherapy (Brachytherapy)
Thought I would be fine after brachytherapy (a form of radiotherapy given internally for uterine cancer and in my case an absolute nightmare far worse than chemotherapy). But years after, I’m experiencing radiation burn on the external parts of my … Continue reading
Posted in Cancer
Tagged brachytherapy, cancer, psoriosis, Radiotherapy, uterine cancer
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Miss Having Lunch Out With My Mum
She hardly likes to go out and even more so since the covid period, but when it comes to my medical appointments she likes to accompany me as my doctors and nurses know her well. She says they are always … Continue reading
Posted in Cancer, Food in Singapore, Peranakan, psoriasis, Singapore Living
Tagged cancer, Life, Living, long term side effects, Peranakan, radiation, Singapore, Singapore Food, Violet Oon
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Feeling Lost today till a Stranger (not quite actually) & Kind Soul reached out
19 years ago I lost my beloved Papa and this whole week (the dates) are a reminder of my nightmares and trauma. I did things today, I would normally enjoy, but I couldn’t quite taste my food or have any … Continue reading
Hesitating to Write about My Psoriasis
I’ve been stopping myself from sharing on this blog, because I’m afraid of being judged. That’s the danger of being honest and putting yourself out there. I really shouldn’t care about the negativity, because that hinders me from connecting with … Continue reading
Posted in Cancer, psoriasis
Tagged cancer, immune system, psoriasis, scalp psoriasis, skin, thoughts, writing
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Oncology Checkup
My writing today will be as real as it can get. Just pure emotion. In real time. 9am: Can’t bring myself to wake up and face the day. There is a heaviness of dread. Can’t wait for the ordeal to … Continue reading
Posted in Anxiety, Cancer
Tagged anxiety, cancer, cathaport, oncologist, personal, Port, radiologist, thoughts, tumour markers
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My Greatest Worry is that Health Insurance Terms & Premiums Keep Changing
The Insurance companies blame the doctors and even the patients, the doctors point out that insurance companies have high management and sales commission costs too. In the end the patient is the one who suffers, especially if they have a … Continue reading
Posted in aging, Anxiety, Cancer, Singapore Living
Tagged aging, anxiety, cancer, consumer rights, distress, health insurance, Life, premiums, unethical
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Does Midlife Begin When You Hit Menopause?
My sister is 50 but hasn’t hit menopause yet and has a remarkable amount of energy. The energy she has is comparable to what I had in my twenties which makes me wonder why I’m so defective. We share 50% … Continue reading
Posted in Cancer, Midlife Musings
Tagged age 50, age 51, aging, cancer, hot flush, menopause, personal, surgical menopause, thoughts, tips
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The 21st Anniversary of My Very First Major Operation
It’s crazy to think that around this time 21 years ago I was rushed to hospital and they had to perform an emergency appendectomy. It was my very first time under the knife and pretty much a traumatic nightmare. A … Continue reading
Posted in Cancer, Midlife Musings
Tagged appendectomy, cancer, cancer surgery, Life, Living, operations, personal, tumours
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Thank You Nalie
I was shocked to see this farewell on my Instagram feed today. One of the saddest things about finding cancer support online is loosing your friends. Knowing someone online can be so powerful, because you kinda know their souls. You … Continue reading
Feeling Extreme Anxiety & Worthlessness
Been feeling especially insecure lately. Exceptionally down emotionally. Don’t feel like a worthy human being. Or at least in this world that values superficial things and status. This world where bullies thrive and aggression is rewarded. I just want peace … Continue reading
My 3rd Cancerversary
Not sure how WordPress works anymore as I haven’t written for so long, everything feels strange. I was discouraged as I spent so much time on deleting spam and updating the tech stuff. Just want to write to offload some … Continue reading
Trying Not to be Scared
Honestly I can’t tell if it’s better or worse not knowing the staging of my endometrial cancer. Perhaps it’s better not to know. The Doctors have admitted that my situation is so rare that there are some things they just … Continue reading
Posted in Cancer
Tagged bucket list, cancer, cancer recurrence, chemo, Dreams, endometrial cancer, fears, thoughts, Travel wishes, visualizing
9 Comments
Looking Back
Grateful for every single visit I got in the hospital and at home since I was diagnosed this January. Each of those visits made the journey so much more bearable and even brought so many moments of joy. Feel so … Continue reading
Posted in Cancer
Tagged cancer, endometrial cancer, family, friends, Grateful, gratitude, ovarian cancer
5 Comments
